• About/Contact
  • Disclosure | Privacy
  • Cookie Policy
  • Sponsorship
  • Home

Tips, activities and support for staying home with your children and joyfully surviving it!

  • Mom Survival Store
  • Complete Guide for SAHMs
  • Kids Activities
    • Infant Activities
    • Toddler Activities
    • Preschool Activities
      • Preschool at Home Curriculum
    • School Age Activities
    • Free or Cheap Kids Activities
  • Motherhood
    • Motivation
      • Me time
    • Homemaking
      • Organization
      • Quick Tips
      • Recipes
    • Faith
    • Parenting
    • Marriage
  • Natural Living
    • Young Living Starter Kit
    • Essential Oils Recipes
    • Cleaning Tips

Encouraging My Husband

February 12, 2016 by Jaimi Erickson 4 Comments

Ready to have the ENERGY to be the best mom you can be? Get started! Thanks for stopping by!

Welcome back! Did you already get started here?

affiliate link disclosure image

Tips and resources for encouraging husbands to be leaders in marriage. This is not a "husbands are the bad guys" article. This is common sense and helpful tips from husbands to husbands.

It used to bother me. In fact, I probably held a bit of a grudge. When other women would share their proposal story there was romance, excitement, and elaborate details involved. For me, it was better to just gloss over the topic. “He said, ‘Will you marry me?’ and I said, ‘Yes.’” Simple. Straightforward. But it annoyed me for years. Comparison was the real problem, but I took it out on him.

I wanted to have a proposal story with lots of details, because that would prove my husband loved me. It wasn’t that I actually doubted my husband loved me. I wondered if he could love me the way that I wanted. Was he going to show grand gestures and create movie-like scenes?

It has taken me over 10 years to realize that I have been holding my husband hostage to a reality that doesn’t exist. My demands have been, “One day, I want a real proposal. You have to think it out and plan ahead.”

The reality was, my husband chose me. He proposed to me.

Here I have been telling him that wasn’t up to snuff.

I can choose to live a life longing for what never happened, or I can embrace the love that God determined I need. It is mine. I can take care of it, nurture it and help it grow, or I can stomp on it, and prevent it from ever hoping to flourish.

I would rather have love than have nothing at all. My husband was sent to me…for a reason.

Finally it dawned on me that maybe I get simple and understated gestures because that is what I need. Goodness knows a dose of humility does me good-very good. What if I was given a large, flamboyant and detailed proposal? What if that became what my marriage was about-flamboyant and detailed, busy and large, material and expensive?

It’s easy to see the light when he is away. When my husband is deployed, it is so easy to see that it is him that I love and not grand gestures or fancy details. The person who is the embodiment of love in my life. My husband loves me because I choose to love him. I often leave him for last after the kids have taken up all my energy. I often take it out on him-when I have no energy left. Yet he still chooses to love me.

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” Ephesians 5:31

Encouraging My Husband

The day after Valentine’s Day happens to be the anniversary of our engagement. The day he sort of asked me to be his wife. I said yes and now we work on forever.  It was our love that was planted on that day. Unique to us-for no one else. We celebrate this anniversary of our engagement apart, but I feel closer in love because I know that it is not the size of a ring that keeps a marriage strong. It is not the details of a proposal that keep a marriage strong. It is not the length of time spent planning date nights or trips away together that keep a marriage strong. It is God. A focus on God keeps a marriage strong.

The motivation to love is better than any fancy proposal out there.

When he is deployed or traveling for work, my husband and I always seem to be more understanding of each other’s’ challenges. Distance does make the heart grow fonder. It’s not that we aren’t communicating when he is home, but it might be the one-on-one time: When my husband is home, and we are deep into the hustle of our days, we are managing life, not really discussing it. When we are apart, there is more sharing and discussion.

Recently, I learned about a marriage devotional that was based on questions men ask about marriage. I don’t know about you, but I think at times my husband wishes he had a marriage manual! He would probably like to turn to the page that describes what to say to your wife when she is giving you “the look,” or the advice on what to say if your wife asks if a certain outfit looks ok on her. I am sure my husband would appreciate a manual like that.

All kidding aside, if I want my marriage to grow stronger, I have to find ways of encouraging my husband to understand and appreciate me as his wife. I have to encourage him to lead our marriage.

“There is hope for your marriage no matter how bad, strained, or in need of repair it may be” One-on-One for Husbands, p.13.

If you are seeking a way to encourage your husband to appreciate you more, to view you as his help-meet, and count you as his personal blessing, One-on-One for Husbands is a great help. It is a 90-day challenge written as a devotional.  I knew it was going to be a great tool for encouraging my husband.

I asked my husband to look through it and gathered his thoughts about it so you would have a husband’s point of view. As a wife, I think this would be a great devotional to work through together, but it is written specifically for husbands. It is one way I am trying to be focused on encouraging my husband.

A note for the husbands out there whose wives may have sent them this link:

This devotional does not paint you as the bad guy. This is not a women are perfect and men are stupid book. On the contrary, this is a book that is meant to encourage husbands to lead their families by learning more about their role in marriage-ultimately creating a partnership with their wife. God created man and woman to be different and to come together in marriage to complete each other. (Cue Jerry Maguire!)

 

One-on-One for Husbands does try to help husbands understand their wives. With daily study topics that relate to questions such as:

How important is it for husbands to listen to their wives?

How do I deal with my wife when she seems too unreasonable?

Can we really understand our wives?

What is the greatest way I can honor my wife?

 

There is only one page of reading per day, with Bible verses included in addition. Each day of study is quick. My husband agreed that, “A page a day is do-able.”

He said, “I did not think it seemed to make husbands bad guys. Perhaps helping them become less aloof when it comes to the mind of a woman”

What if your husband is unwilling to work through a devotional? I have some tips!

  • Read it yourself. One page per day. Think about the topic for that day and bring it up at dinner or after the kids go to sleep. Engage your husband to hear his perspective. (We should be listening to them as much as we want them to listen to us!) When it comes to the action steps, re-word them to ask your husband if he can act in that way more regularly. Offer him your commitment to give him the same consideration.
  • Send him a message. Take a picture of a page that you feel speaks directly to an issue in your marriage. Send it via text or email to your husband and ask him for his thoughts when he gets a minute. It is a quick way to engage him in a non-confrontational way.
  • Build your husband up! No matter what, our marriage will benefit from the time we spend on it. Our mindset and actions directly affect our husbands and our children. You can control your actions and words when it comes to your husband. Build him up! Sometimes when we want to improve a situation it has to start with us. You lose nothing by trying to build up your husband. In my experience (and I have only been married for 12 years) whenever I have supported my husband with my words and actions, his actions and words are more positive towards me too.

We often wish our husbands would regularly thank us for our time caring for the home and children, but it can be hard to know how to bring up that topic without sounding selfish. When we stop and think about our husband’s contributions to our family, and approach him with thanks and respect, that goes a long way to build a strong one-on-one relationship in marriage. I am still learning and trying to stay focused on this mindset every day.

How do you encourage your husband?

Encouraging husbands to be leaders at home-creating a marriage partnership built on the fact that God created men and women to complete each other in marriage.
 

Disclosure: My dad volunteers on the board of One-on-One Ministries started by Lee Moseley, the author of One-on-One for Husbands. I was not compensated for writing this post. One-on-One is a non-profit organization with a mission to build one-on-one relationships by being the hands and feet of Jesus’ message.

 

Successful Mom Daily Checklist to help you gain balance between housework and play time with the kids. Get more done, and feel more successful as a mom and homemaker.

Enjoy your time at home!

Your Name

Filed Under: faith, marriage, motivation Tagged With: books, husband, review

Comments

  1. Sybil Brun says

    February 13, 2016 at 8:24 am

    This is so good, Jaimi! Reminds me of how I would compare my wedding day to the wedding day of others since mine had quite a few snafus that were out of my control. I longed for what could have been whenever I would think about it for years! But just like you, I came to appreciate how inconsequential it really was in the big picture! It’s my marriage that really matters. Thanks for these encouraging reminders!

    Reply
    • Jaimi says

      February 13, 2016 at 1:01 pm

      Isn’t that the truth! Comparison at times just is not helpful. You are so right that in the grand scheme of life, we have to focus on the details that matter most. Wedding days, proposals, rings or flowers just are not the things that we need to be using to weigh our love for our husbands. Thanks so much for sharing your own story!

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. As the Mother of A Son - The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide says:
    January 22, 2017 at 3:02 pm

    […] my shoulders. I must raise my sons to become men while considering that they might one day become husbands. Maybe one day down the road they will become fathers as well. (Way down the […]

    Reply
  2. Complete Guide for Stay-at-Home Moms: Marriage - The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide says:
    May 29, 2016 at 2:44 pm

    […] Encouraging My Husband – The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival Guide […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Follow Me on Instagram!

sahmsg_jaimi

They were posing nicely, but I said make some funn They were posing nicely, but I said make some funny faces. They did. 🤣🤣

#motherhoodjourney
#faithblogger
#momentsinmotherhood
#momssupportingmoms
#familytimeisthebesttime
#mommytime
#familymoments
#momlifestyle
#lovemyhome
#momproblems
#thisismotherhood
#familymatters
#momlifebelike
#stayathomemom
#motherhoodunplugged
#momlife
#familytime
#amomentinmotherhood
#momsonamission
#stayathomemama
#momswhoinspire
#mominspiration
#familyactivity
#familyqualitytime
#familytimeisqualitytime
#momliferules
#sahmlifestyle
#mommoment
#faithfamily
#faithandfamily
All troubles in life can be solved with more Jesus All troubles in life can be solved with more Jesus. 

He is risen! ☀️ 

Happy Easter / Resurrection Sunday from the Erickson clan. 💕 

I pray each of you seek the ultimate truth and know God is working through you. You are significant, loved and appreciated. 🤗 

#faithlife
#amomentinmotherhood
#momsonamission
#stayathomemama
#instafamilytime
#homemakerlife
#momlifeisbestlife
#momlifeinspo
#homeschoolmomma
#momlifeunplugged
#spendingqualitytime
#homeschoolblogger
#stayathomemomma
#familytimeisqualitytime
#momliferules
#sahmlifestyle
#mommoment
#faithfamily
#faithandfamily
#realmoms
#lifeasamama
#momlifebestlife
#joyfulmama
#momsunite
#lovefamilytime
#mamatribe
#lifewithlittles
#momsofinsta
#mamahood
#honestlymothering
I pictured myself as a mom of boys before having m I pictured myself as a mom of boys before having my babies. I have learned so much from all my children but having my girls is a blessing I never knew I needed. 

Want to eliminate mean girls? Raise daughters to do the opposite.

Want to teach women to better communicate with each other? Raise daughters to listen and articulate.

They are my own little girl group and I am grateful for it. They love me on my bad days and give me compliments I do not even deserve. 

I do love being the mom of girls (and boys). They both teach me so much. 

What are the top lessons you wish girls would learn before becoming adults? 

#homeschoollife
#homeschoolmom
#momlifebelike
#stayathomemom
#sahm
#motherhoodunplugged
#momlife
#familytime
#mommytime
#familymoments
#momlifestyle
#thisismotherhood
#familymatters
#momtime
#thatmomlife
#stayathomemomlife
#motherhoodalive
#homeschoolfamily
#momswhoblog
#motherhoodthroughig
#mymamahood
#realmoms
#lifeasamama
#momlifebestlife
#joyfulmama
#momsunite
#momliferules
#sahmlifestyle
#mommoment
#joyfulmotherhood
Will you be spending time with family for Easter? Will you be spending time with family for Easter? 

My husband’s parents have arrived - adding one more big dog to our house and lots of crafts and fun. We have not seen them since June. Everyone is excited to spend time together.

Both of my big kids have birthdays and we will all get to spend time at the beach this month. Our school work will morph into field trips so we soak up every day we can being present with family. 

I am looking forward to making memories, soaking in time together and celebrating two milestone birthdays - one happening tomorrow. 💛 

#motherhoodjourney
#faithblogger
#momentsinmotherhood
#momssupportingmoms
#familytimeisthebesttime
#mommytime
#familymoments
#momlifestyle
#lovemyhome
#momproblems
#thisismotherhood
#familymatters
#momlifebelike
#stayathomemom
#motherhoodunplugged
#momlife
#familytime
#amomentinmotherhood
#momsonamission
#stayathomemama
#momswhoinspire
#mominspiration
#familyactivity
#familyqualitytime
#familytimeisqualitytime
#momliferules
#sahmlifestyle
#mommoment
#faithfamily
#faithandfamily
“Never underestimate the healing of a quiet mome “Never underestimate the healing of a quiet moment in the garden.” 
-Unknown

#momlifestyleblogger
#homeschoolingmoms
#organizingexpert
#gardenerslife 
#homemakerlife
#gardeningismytherapy 
#momlifeinspo
#homeschoolmomma
#momlifeunplugged
#spendingqualitytime
#homeschoolblogger
#stayathomemomma
#mommoment
#faithfamily
#faithandfamily
#homeschooladventures
#tidyhousetidymind
#unfilteredmotherhood
#decoratingtips
#joyfulmotherhood
#tidyingup
#homeschoolingmom
#homeschoolmama
#homestyledecor
#busymoms
#housedecoration
#momhacks
#simplymamahood
#realmomlife
#homeidea
🌟The faces we make when a Costco run with all t 🌟The faces we make when a Costco run with all the kids actually goes well!!! 🌟 

Ice cream after helped of course. 😂

All prepped for my in-laws coming to visit us after not seeing them since our move last summer. Looking forward to some fun events ahead that will make my kids think they are on spring break but they will technically be field trip days. Check, check. 

Are you guys on spring break this week? What do you have planned?

#momlifestyleblogger #stayathomemommylife #momlifeisbestlife #momlifeunplugged #sahmlifestyle #momlife101 #momsofmultiples #stayathomemama #momswhoinspire #momswithgoals #mommotivation #aintnohoodlikemotherhood #stayathomemommy #momlifeunfiltered #motherhoodlife #momhood #honestmommin #realmoms #lifeasamama #joyfulmama #mommymode #momtime #lifeasmama #justmomlife #motherhoodthroughig #momsofinsta #mamahood #momentsinmotherhood #thisismotherhood #momlifebelike
Some days you put on the 10 year old comfy jeans, Some days you put on the 10 year old comfy jeans, fill your mind with encouragement and just keep moving forward. 

Recovery days are not just for working out. They are for the mental state we walk around with too. Yesterday felt heavy. My God is a power lifter and takes the burden away. 

Today will be better.

Today we will rest and refocus.

Hooray for comfy jeans, motivational graphics and the Word to focus on through it all. 

(Faith fashion: @choseninchrist use code Jaimi to save.)

#faithmama #faithmamas #intentionalmotherhood #inspiredmotherhood #homemakerlife #homeschoolmoms #thisismotherhood #mindsetiseverything #faithiseverything #faithblogger #momblogger
🌟That Face!!🌟 That little boy is soon to t 🌟That Face!!🌟 

That little boy is soon to turn 13, guys! I mean in a few weeks. 😅

This is a throwback but brings back so many fun memories. 

—————————————

I love creating activities and crafts on the fly. Always have even before my kids were here.

I noticed that my son did not have a lot of little toy people to play with while he was pretending one day. We have a few cylinder blocks in a set. We never used them when we built. I thought we could turn them into little DIY toy people. 

They were so cute and easy to make. It was a preschool art project for him. We made them together.

If you don’t have wooden cylindrical blocks at home, you can use pieces of wood dowel or even a few square blocks glued together. You can even make DIY toy people out of toilet paper tubes. 

🌟Full details through Blog link in bio 🌟

——————————————

I am so excited and yet in complete shock by how fast these little lives grow. I have never missed moments and I am so so grateful especially as we approach the teen years in my house. 💛 Soak up even the hard days of being a mom. TOTALLY worth it. 

#preciousmomentsathome #stayathomemomlife #sahmlife #momofboys #myheartisfull #homeschoolgrace #familytime #motherhoodrealities #kidsactivities #kids #blogger #bloggerlife #blogging #momlife
👌 There are a lot of parenting opinions out the 👌 There are a lot of parenting opinions out there. I try to ignore a lot of them. 😂 

My kids stay up later than most recommend, but so did I when I was a kid. 

She loves to read. She loves to write. Abby writes plays, journal entries, songs and on a bad day she will write her feelings about it all, in depth, no holds barred. 

This night she was trying to finish up a play - setting, character details, order of lines - for a play she made for her younger sister. 

I am so thankful that we can count her love of writing in her free time as school work. I am so thankful that how we do school allows this passion and talent to thrive. She has stacks of drawings, plays and writing blurbs. They are all precious to her.

There are days I question whether this choice or that choice is right or “approved,” but it does not matter when I see my children dive deep into the things they love. 

#realschool #teachermom #homeschool #homeschoollife #lifeisgood #findjoy #teachthemyoung #teachyourchildrenwell #neverstoplearning #parenting #parentingopinions #motherhoodinspired #inspiredhomeschool #unschooling
Give me my people any day. Family time this Sund Give me my people any day. 

Family time this Sunday was a 5k fundraiser race. We helped raise 💵 for the spouses’ club scholarship fund. Scholarships will be awarded for post secondary education to military kids and spouses. 

If you can choose any action in life, choose to help others. Side bonus when it involves fun family time together.

Best day yet. 💛💛💛

#sundayfunday #sunday #sundaywiththefam #raceday #5k #runwalk #familylife #familyfirst #homeschool #homesweethome #homeschooling #hometime #fundraising #fundraiser #osc #camplejeune #closc #eastnc #easternnc #optoutside #adventuretime #outdoorfun #foracause
💛 Friday Introductions💛 It has been a while 💛 Friday Introductions💛

It has been a while since I did a good run-down here to give ya the cliffs notes (are those still a thing) version of me. 👋 

💛 Detroit-born a few blocks from where Eminem lived. The city is still my hometown despite moving away as a kid.

💛 I am a big believer in traditional values, but with a modern woman twist. My husband drives his career and I drive this household.

💛 We live in eastern NC 30 mins from the beach. I want to stay here forever, truly, but military life will come to an end some day...still don’t know specifically when that will be.

💛Born and raised to be a planner, Type A personality, having 4 kids beat that out of me 🤣 and I am very “day at a time” now. 

💛I was a teacher turned stay at home mom turned blogger turned entrepreneur that had to set it all on the back burner a bit to focus on homeschooling my kids. I can only have so much on my plate and complete it successfully. (When we listen, God guides and is loud and clear with His direction. 💛)

💛I believe I can be humble and confident; I can be fully present with my kids and make space to rest and rejuvenate; I believe the biggest successes I will achieve in life will not have a paycheck as its valuation. 

💛I believe that true peace, value and love all come from Jesus. 

You will find me sharing the ups AND the downs of motherhood, wife life, homeschooling and being a Christian woman with the modern day pull to fight what that can mean. (There is def a force trying to convince us to push those values aside, my friends.)

👌What is the cliffs notes version of you? What do you want people to know/realize most of all?

#happyfriday #fridayintroductions #thisisme #gardenathome #homeschooling #naturalliving #motherhoodjourney #stayathomemoms #militarylife #Faithmamas #cliffsnotes #motherhoodsocial
🌟Teaching Kids to Make Friends🌟 Often our c 🌟Teaching Kids to Make Friends🌟

Often our children learn hard lessons when they have to move to a new state or school. 

My kids have become all too familiar with this through military life. Every three years they have to make new friends.

It is not always simple.

As a child, my family moved a lot. We were not military, but in junior high I moved to a new state and had to make all new friends.

This was a challenging and even to some extent a traumatic time of life.

Being the new kid, is a humbling experience. Suddenly you are hoping that your peers will want to get to know you and like you. It creates some self-consciousness.

Reading is such a beneficial way to teach children about life lessons. It teaches much more than that. It teaches self esteem through the cuddle time. It teaches language skills, and it teaches children to use their minds to be creative.

As they have grown and navigated more friendships, books are a resource for us to discuss tough challenges. I have found a great series of books that present friendship challenges and help children learn to navigate them.

It just so happens that the author is my neighbor too! How cool is that?! Moms are amazing.

These books will be treasured by your family for their quality values. The @stingrayjelly series teach children how to make friends and navigate friendships to love others well and support them through shared similarities and recognized differences.

Author, Lauren Giannella is a military wife and my neighbor! Anna Perdue is the illustrator and also a military child. 

Read my blog post for details on each book and links to purchase through @barnesandnoble 

We love our military community and all they do to give back.

What are your favorite children’s books that teach children how to make friends or help them maneuver through tough life challenges?

#books #booksforkids #militaryspouse #militaryspouses #militarywife #militarylife #militarykids #teachingkids #goodbooks #readtokids #readingtime #homeschoolreading #homeschoolmoms #eastnc #usmclife #marinecorpsfamily #motherhoodsocial
Follow on Instagram





Copyright © 2021 · Magazine Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in



©2018 The Stay-at-Home-Mom Survival Guide – Jaimi Erickson

HOME | ABOUT | DISCLOSURE/PRIVACY | SPONSORSHIP

Facebook | Pinterest | Email