Is your path of motherhood paved like every other mom? Feel like your way to seek happiness as a mom looks different from the rest? That's ok.

{Post by Heather}

In the last couple of weeks, I’ve had a couple of encounters with other women that have left me feeling less than. It’s happened before and unfortunately, it’s bound to happen again. I know it’s not something that women do on purpose or because they’re judging me, but it irks me none-the-less as I try to seek happiness as a mom.

So what could these women possibly have said or done that has me upset?

They talked about how sad it was that I had to work instead of staying at home full time.

In one instance, I was at work when this exchange happened. Another was when I had to leave the kids during the weekend because I had to go get ready for work.

I’m sure they were just trying to be compassionate and make me feel better about missing out on things with my family, or because the notion is that everyone dreads working.

But what I felt was pity.

And perhaps they weren’t pitying me and I completely misread them, but it felt like pity.

And all I have to say is this:

Please don’t pity me for having a job, and an unconventional job at that.

Here are some concrete facts about my job and my situation working.

I work an opposite schedule than my husband.

The plus side to that is my children always have a parent at home with them. They don’t have to go to after-school or have a babysitter.

That is important to me.

I know a lot of women who don’t have that option, and I feel blessed that we currently do. With this crazy military life, one day we won’t.

I love that my children can come home and see both parents as we swap roles. They are able to do their homework and go play with their friends.

Even though as parents we’re constantly busy my children have a great and stable routine.

Sure, I miss out on weekend activities with my children and husband.

There are many times I miss out on BBQ’s, birthday parties and evening get-togethers because of work. I’ve had to leave early or bring my work clothes to many events just so I could attend them with my family. Then I have to apologize to the host for leaving early and sneak out to drive to work.

At least I was able to attend part of the event and my children didn’t miss out on seeing their friends. One of us was able to be there.

At the end of the day I’ve only missed out on an hour at a BBQ. My life will not end if I’m not always at every social event that we’re invited to attend.

Of course, I’m tired and sometimes it does stink.

Working mostly nights and doubles definitely makes you tired especially when you have to wake up at 5:45 am to get the kids ready for school.

I can go into work, I can wake up early, I can keep a clean house and still provide for our family in a way that suits me.

Are there moments where I feel exhausted? For sure!

Are there times I’m getting ready for work and thinking man it would be so nice to be getting my yoga pants on? That’s most every moment of every day.

But I love that I am earning another income for our family. It’s allowed us to get completely out of debt besides our house. Now, we can stay out of debt. That wasn’t happening when I stayed at home and we had to buy another car, or buy plane tickets to visit family.

What work do I do? I am a server at a restaurant.

I seem to get pity from others regarding with fact.

My education and my job don’t seem to line up. I went to school and have an education. But, a unique job helps me seek happiness as a mom.

How? The reasons truly are endless for me on this one.

1. It works around my family’s schedule. (This is definitely number 1!)
2. It’s flexible.
3. I’ve known and worked with most of my coworkers on and off for 10 years. (They’re family.)
4. I make more serving than I would with my degree. I actually found out I was making more than some teacher friends.
5. There’s no work to take home.
6. I’m good at it.

I ENJOY working!

Even though I have to leave my kids and husband, and miss out on a lot of things, I truly enjoy working. It gives me a sense of purpose outside of being a wife and mother and the million other things I juggle in my family life. I like that I contribute to my family’s finances and it makes me feel good to do so. It helps me seek happiness as a mom.

So before you look at me with sad eyes remember that each of us has a different vision about what we want our life to look like. We each will follow a different path to seek happiness as a mom.

Some of us moms want to work odd hours, and miss out on certain things.

Some moms want to homeschool and work from home.

Some want to work a 9 to 5 job.

Some want to solely focus on being a stay-at-home mom 24-7.

The scenarios are truly endless.

All of these scenarios have one thing in common: We moms are able to have the choice to make our life look the way we want.

As moms we do what is best for our family, our kids, and our own personal situation at the time. Our lives all look different and that’s okay!

It’s actually awesome that we can all be so different. What’s most important is that we love the life we’re creating because at the end of the day that’s really all that matters.

Seek happiness as a mom.

A weekly series of motivation for moms brought to you by stay at home mom bloggers at The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival Guide.

Have you ever felt that others pity you for the way you seek happiness as a mom? How have you dealt with those feelings?

Does your ability to seek happiness as a mom depend on your cjoies

Heather of Just Becoming Me contributor to Mom Motivation Mondays series at The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival GuideHeather lives in Florida with her husband, two girls and two pups. She is a lover of most things in life, too many to name here without scaring you, but a few include working out, learning new recipes, Pinterest, organizing (yes, it’s true!), home decor and learning to lead a more minimal and purposeful life.

She started Just Becoming Me as a venture to better understand herself and what will lead her towards a more fulfilling life. Her motto is: “We only have one life, and I want to learn to live mine in a way that gets me excited to jump out of bed.”

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