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Home » motherhood » Wanted: Mom Friends

Wanted: Mom Friends

Welcome to Mom Motivation Mondays where weekly contributing writers share their motherhood experiences to encourage you to find the joy in being a mom.
{This week: Guest Post by Lisa Brown}

Wanted: Mom Friends! Do you find it hard to make mom friends? Making friends as a mom can be hard work, yet we often feel we need friends to help us through motherhood.

There have been seasons in my life where I have had more time on my own than with friends or family.  Friends move away or life gets busy. Disagreements happen and hearts are broken. High school friends graduated and went different directions.  In my twenties my college and church friends got married and had babies.  I stayed single. In my thirties my friends were the people I worked with.

I was forty when God brought me my amazing husband.  At age forty-two we both became parents for the first time.  My circle of friends at that time did not include other new moms. I did not have mom friends.

While friends were at work or doing activities with their older kids, I was a stay at home mom holding my precious baby in my lap, rocking him to sleep with tears running down my cheeks. I felt alone because there was no other mom around me in the same boat.

I went to parks and saw parents in their twenties visiting with each other while they pushed their toddlers on the swings.  I knew of moms that had siblings with children close to the same age as their children, so family time was their social time.  On holidays and weekends their kids had friends to play with. Mine didn’t.

When my first child was four months old, I worried that he was not going to have any friends, and it was going to be all my fault.  

I felt disappointed that I had no mom friends to call over for a cup of coffee and small talk.  I was sad when I had no one to celebrate those special momma moments with.  I felt like I was a bad mom and I had no one to share my concerns with.

I was exhausted from sleep deprivation during the first several months. Post-partum depression was kicking me in the butt. I felt like God forgot about my need for fellowship. 

I started to question my will and God’s will for me to be a stay at home mom.  I didn’t feel like I could do it.  I was overwhelmed with household tasks and things breaking down in our home.  My forty two year old body was recovering from a C-section, blood clot, and infections.  This was not what I imagined Motherhood to be like.  I had no mom friends to lean on or to pray for me.

A heaviness came over me and I felt lifeless.  This scared me.

When my son was four months old I decided that I needed to get out of this rut and find some Mom Friends to hang out with.  God came through for me, but I had to be willing to reach out and look up. I met a group of Moms with babies through my church. Seven years later we are all still together. Now that our children are school age we don’t meet as much as we used too. When we do meet our time is so very sweet.

Making mom friends is hard, but sometimes you need to break out of your rut and make the first move to build friendships.

I’m almost fifty and homeschooling my two kids who are seven and five.  I have learned over all these years that making mom friends is hard and keeping friends active in my life is even harder.  I have discovered that I have to be a leader among my friends.

I have to initiate play dates and moms’ nights out. I have to set up one on one coffee dates and Bible book studies.  I don’t wait for others to set up a meeting time. I have taken it upon myself to keep us together.


Learn how to host a playdate to meet mom friends and keep postpartum depression and loneliness away.


The wonderful thing about our group is that there are other leaders in our circle who create fun things for us to do too. We are a family of mom friends because we care about each other.

Perhaps God is calling you to be a leader among your friends to keep everyone in contact. Maybe God is calling you to start a group for moms. Don’t wait for someone to call you. You be the one to make the call.  Take time to show someone that they matter to you.

Wanted: Mom Friends! Do you find it hard to make mom friends? Making friends as a mom can be hard work, yet we often feel we need friends to help us through motherhood.


Wanted: Mom Friends! Lisa Brown from COmmunity Moms blog shares how she felt when she became a new mom and did not have a support system in place. This is great advice for moms whether new or experienced!

My Name is Lisa Brown and I lead a blog community for moms. Me Too Moments For Moms has over twenty writers who share their stories on a daily basis.  We are a blog that runs 24/7 and is a place where moms come for encouragement and inspiration.   We would love for you to come hang out with us and follow along. Connect with Me Too Moments for Moms on Facebook and Pinterest.


How have you made mom-friends?

Want more mom-motivation for the week ahead?

Click below for the entire Mom Motivation Mondays series.

A weekly series of motivation for moms brought to you by stay at home mom bloggers at The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival Guide.

Successful Mom Daily Checklist to help you gain balance between housework and play time with the kids. Get more done, and feel more successful as a mom and homemaker.

Enjoy your time at home!

Your Name

November 1, 2015 by Jaimi Erickson 13 Comments Filed Under: faith, motherhood, motivation Tagged With: encouragement, family, MMM contributors, quick tip

Comments

  1. Becky Banks says

    December 3, 2015 at 6:30 am

    I can so relate … My oldest is 20 and I’m almost 50 with my youngest at 5 yr. and 8 yrs old. Finding a mom group is crucial, especially, when you’re a new mom. I’m finding that my mom friends I started out with in my 20’s are soon to be empty nesters … It’s been harder to stay connected because we’re at such a different life stage. There have been seasons of motherhood where God has told me to build relationships at home … it was a true heart shift. Thanks for sharing your story, Jamie 🙂

    Reply
    • Jaimi says

      December 5, 2015 at 10:11 pm

      I just love that statement you made: “God has told me to build relationships at home.” Heaven! Truly that is when we hit the point of finding peace in and with motherhood. That is so important for all moms to remember-we are called to build our homes. Thanks so much for sharing, Becky!

      Reply
  2. Christina says

    November 10, 2015 at 7:09 pm

    Your story is absolutely beautiful, Lisa. I can relate to what you went through. Thank you for reaching out (and I know your friends thank you too!) You are living an amazing motherhood story. It matters so!

    Reply
  3. Wendy Munsell says

    November 3, 2015 at 6:56 pm

    What a mothering story you’ve been on, Lisa! Your account of taking the lead in making and keeping friends is inspiring. Thank-you for sharing your unique journey!

    Reply
    • Lisa Brown says

      November 4, 2015 at 5:51 am

      Thanks Wendy, It is a journey and one that I enjoy traveling with others. It’s neat how God brings people together. Being intentional is everything. Taking time out of life to meet someone for coffee or a walk in the park is awesome. Have a blessed day Wendy!!

      Reply

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