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Family Boundaries Equal Family Values

August 13, 2017 by Jaimi Erickson Leave a Comment

Ready to have the ENERGY to be the best mom you can be? Get started! Thanks for stopping by!

Welcome back! Did you already get started here?

Welcome to Mom Motivation Mondays where weekly contributing writers share their motherhood experiences to encourage you to find the joy in being a mom.

{This week: Post by Lisa}

I guard the inside and outside of my home and nothing will pass me. Our family boundaries equal our family values and it's my job as a parent to teach them.

My dogs do a great job warning me if someone enters my yard. The fence and markings around my house defines my boundaries. To walk through my yard to take a short cut or to throw litter in my grass is a violation. What comes in and out of my yard matters to me and I don’t take trespassing lightly.

I’d call the police if someone climbed over my backyard fence. I don’t let anybody in my house unless I know them. I don’t open the door if I have never met them before. No one has any business interrupting my time or entering through my yard unless invited.

I guard the inside and outside of my home and nothing will pass me.

I feel the same way about my heart and my family. I’m very careful about what I listen to, read, and watch. I only allow people into my home that are respectful and show honor. My heart rests in my home. It’s a quiet place where I feel safe. I fight to keep it a safe place for my loved ones.Boundaries are rules that we set to protect our heart, mind, and body. We have boundaries to keep others out that don’t respect us.

I’m committed to teaching my children good healthy boundaries. They need to see a strong momma who stands up against wrong and fights for truth. There are parents and kids that we don’t invite over for dinner or play dates. We will not go over to everyone’s house that we get invited to. For others to be part of our inner life they need to share the same values that we have. They need to show a love towards God and others.

Why Teach Children Boundaries?

Children need to take charge of their personal space. Everyone should have a safe invisible line around them that keeps hurtful people out. How we keep our children safe is for another post. This post is to teach children to respect other people’s boundaries.

I want my children to have good healthy relationships and be invited to good loving Christian homes for dinner and play dates.

I don’t want my child to be the one climbing other people’s fences to take a short cut. I don’t want to get a phone call from a police officer telling me that my daughter or son trespassed. I don’t want my kids to come back home after they have moved out because they got fired for being lazy at work.

In teaching children boundaries I expect them to honor my boundaries.

Good teaching happens in the day to day life by caring for our home and one another. If children don’t learn to show honor in family life they will have a hard time showing it out in the world. The best thing we can do for our kids is to set limits, have them participate in chores, and do what they are asked to do when we ask them to do it.

It’s up to the parents to create routines and schedules for children to follow and respect.

Even though everyone’s input is important, parents must be the ones who make the final decision. In the real world of work, we all know that the boss expects workers to do exactly what they are asked to do.

Home is the place to practice doing what is expected and doing it well. We are only hurting our kids if we don’t have clear boundaries.

Boundaries That Teach Family Values

The following are suggestions, my opinion, and come from my value system. I’m not saying you should do the following. I’m simply sharing ideas for you to consider if you wish.

Every family is different and we all have to stand for what we believe is right. We can’t let our children walk all over us and get what they want all the time. We must be consistent and have appropriate consequences when rules are broken.

A family without clear rules is a family that lives in chaos. Kids who live in chaos don’t have boundaries or respect other people’s boundaries.

A spoiled child lives selfishly.

This is what I believe:

1. Parents own the house and kids are the guests. Kids must be kind and respectful. Pick up after yourself and don’t bring anything in the house that is not permitted.
2. Parents rule screen time and kids must comply.
3. Parents interview friends before play dates, sleep overs, or going out. Parents have final say.
4. Parents have final say about music and books
5. Parents make the final decision about child’s education
6. Parents set the stage for homework time, bed time, and outdoor play.
7. Parents may look through back packs, desks and drawers any time they wish. No lock boxes.
8. Parents are in charge of assigning chores for kids to do daily.
9. Parents hold the keys to the car and set the curfew time.
10. Parents choose church and religion for family. Kids don’t have to accept but are required to go to church when parents go.
11. Parents are in charge of what food will be served and the time meals will be served.
12. Parents chose bed time and what time kids need to get up in the morning.

Within my set of rules I give my kids choices, flexibility, and training. My goal is to train them to make wise decisions on their own.

I want them to know how to pick good friends, be kind in conflict, and serve one another out of love and to care for their own wellbeing.

I strive to train my children to think for themselves because ultimately that is what they are going to need to do.

A weekly series of motivation for moms brought to you by stay at home mom bloggers at The Stay-at-Home Mom Survival Guide.

What do you do to teach family values in your home?

I guard the inside and outside of my home and nothing will pass me. Our family boundaries equal our family values and it's my job as a parent to teach them.


Wanted: Mom Friends! Lisa Brown from COmmunity Moms blog shares how she felt when she became a new mom and did not have a support system in place. This is great advice for moms whether new or experienced!Lisa is an aspiring writer with a mother’s passion for Homeschool Education. She has an 8 yr. old son, a 7 yr. old daughter, and has been married to her husband for 10+ yrs. Prior to marriage, she worked over 20 yrs. enriching the lives of hundreds of children and families. Lisa has a Bachelors in Social Work and Early Childhood Education. You can read more of Lisa’s posts on her blog – The Family Roadmap


 

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As far as our home and homeschool, 2021 has been a As far as our home and homeschool, 2021 has been a dream so far! 

Kids are eager to learn and ask for more, we have a system down, and I am even getting rest time in the evening after the kitchen is cleaned up. My husband and I get time together while the kids are still awake which is important for them to see. 

It has taken some realization of truth to create this peace and balance. Teaching my kids is a full time job. I am giving it that time this year and it is making all the difference. #shed #deadweightisgone #focusonthepresent #focusonfamily #thisismywork #homeschoolingmom #homeschoolingmama #homeschoolisafulltimejob #intentionalhomeschooling #intentionalmotherhood #intentionalmama #wifeandmother #homemakingmotivation #schoolathome #lifebalance
How long have you known your spouse? This guy an How long have you known your spouse? 

This guy and I met our senior year of high school. What a journey we were in for and did not ever realize! 

•4 kids + 1 miscarriage
•Navigating long distance relationship while dating, engaged and married
•Working to build faith as the center and focus of “us”
•Loving each other at our ugliest moments
•Building our home team for the long term

Every time the world feels heavy, chaotic, and strange, our marriage is a safe place. It makes our home calm amongst the storm of global politics. 

I have grown content with our imperfections- because there are much bigger problems to navigate in the world...am I right?! 😳

That brings me so much peace. 

Loving not only how well we work together but also the ways we still need to improve. That is where I am in my marriage. Grateful to have so much history with this guy. It fills my tank for all the years we have ahead of us to navigate as well. 

#marriedtomybestfriend #cliche #iknowtoomuch #humorinmarriage #truelove #imperfectlove #imperfectmarriage #beingcontent #marriagegoals #letGodlead #marriagecenteredonfaith #longtermgoals
It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, yo It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, you can not do it all well. 

Hi, my name is Jaimi and sometimes I deliver truth that cuts to the heart. 👌😉

Women have been fed a lie that they can and need to juggle it all. I have learned to juggle. Eventually balls fall. 

As I took on more because I was told all that mattered was my mindset, I inevitably had to set aside the tasks that God called me to do first. We never take on more and more and more and stay in balance without setting aside more than we should.

It is not a matter of mindset, it is a matter of priorities.

Have you heard of the “one thing every day”? Many make that a clean kitchen, workout completed or devotional time. My one this is my family. If I focus on them each day I feel successful. 

In my home there is peace. The world is in chaos, power has become currency, and morals have fallen away. But “me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

It has nothing to do with gender. No one can take on something new without setting aside something they were working on already. 

Peace and order in my home is worth it. I am setting aside the things that bring chaos into my life and home. I am only focusing on the things that serve God here. 

What have you done to focus on success with completing your priorities this year? Have you made small changes to get there or large leaps?

#2021 #familyisnumber1 #familyovereverything #settingintentions #2021goals #serviceworks #intentionalmotherhood #intentionalwomen #traditionalmotherhood #homemakerlife #homemakinggoals #peacebeforechaos #choosepeace #godispeace #godislove #loveistruth #truthspeaker #truthseeker #godlywoman #godlywomanhood #pridetakesabackseat #prideisgone #humblethyself
Today we took the Christmas decorations down. It m Today we took the Christmas decorations down. It marked the real start of 2021 for us. 

For some reason I am feeling ready for Spring cleaning. Funny enough, as I was cleaning out some flower pots that had gone a little stagnant over the colder weeks, I saw shoots! My plants think Spring is on its way-it has been warm here over the last few days. 

Being greeted by this view as we were piling into the van this morning, felt energizing. 

My steps heading in to 2021 are more careful, pragmatic. It feels good to feel on course, back to what matters most, and have zero guilt for what I will put on the back burner this year to stay focused on giving my family my best. 

#Godslight #morning #morningview #sunrise #waterview #energy #healing #balance #balanceasamom #sayingseeyoulater #focusonthegood #focusongoals #familygoals #familylife #motivatedmama #pragmaticsteps #homeschoolmom #homeschoolinglife #homeschoolmama #2021goals #momlife #mom2021 #traditionalfamily #conservativemamas #familyfirst
"The only rock I know that stays steady, the only "The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works, is the family." - Lee Iacocca 

#quotes #quoteoftheday #perfectlove #imperfectpeople #family #familyfirst #lifegoal #stayathomemom #theworkisworthit #familywork #inspiredmotherhood #motherhoodrising #motherhoodjourney #momstagram #momstrong #sahmoms #sahmgoals #sahmjourney
Anyone else having about 3 Christmases with shippi Anyone else having about 3 Christmases with shipping challenges delaying packages? 🤣🤣

With family all long distance + the twins birthday 2 days after Christmas we end up with about 4 gift opening sessions over the course of Christmas week. I see no complaints from these kids. 😆 

How did package shipping go for you this year? Do you plan ahead for shipping gifts? 

We are definitely grateful for giving family. #christmasweek #giftopening #givinggifts #moregifts #feelingloved #holiday2020 #familytime2020
⭐️ LIVE GROWTH EVENT ⭐️ Bringing mamas / b ⭐️ LIVE GROWTH EVENT ⭐️
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➡️ Follow me ⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
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Scanning old pics for our little pug and this one Scanning old pics for our little pug and this one made me laugh! Grumpy pug face on Maybelle and Henry. 🤣 Oh memories are sweet. 

#pugs #kids #twinmom #pugmom #rip #memories #2020 #motherhoodsocial
To whom much is given, much is expected. I have To whom much is given, much is expected. 

I have nothing but gratitude for this year, these people, and this life. 

Merry Christmas from us to you! 

#christmasgreeting #merrychristmas #christmas2020 #allgoodthings #towhommuchisgiven #abundantlyblessed #blessedbeyondmeasure #familyiswealth #wealthislove #familyfirst #christmasinspiration #theimportantthings #peoplefirst #jesusisborn #motherhoodsocial
“The thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices, “The thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices, 
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.”

#believe #jesusisreal #savior #bethlehemstar #starofbethlehem #godislove #godoverscience #godfirst #truth #ohholynight #wisemenstillseekhim #womenseekhimtoo #thecurefor2020 #eternallife #motherswithcameras #faithmoms #looktothesky #savedbygrace #christmasstar #jesusbirthdaycelebration #senttosave #nightsky #heavenlybodies
Every ornament on our tree holds meaning. Many are Every ornament on our tree holds meaning. Many are kid-made; some were gifts to commemorate milestones like marriage and births; some we purchased each year with the theme of that year to remind us. 

A few ornaments have impact for other reasons. They beautify our tree while impacting the lives of female crafters in parts of the world that need to be lifted up. This new addition has a backstory. Swipe right to read it. 🌟💜 I am blessed to support the @younglivingfoundation 

I love the memories of my tree. So many favorite ornaments. 

Which of your ornaments are your favorite? 

#ohchristmastree #christmas #christmastime #ylfoundation #ylfoundationornament #christmastree #ornaments #impactinglives #worldimpact #motherhoodimpact #womenimpact #empoweringwomen #motherhoodsocial
Our acts of kindness Christmas countdown has been Our acts of kindness Christmas countdown has been going well. Weaving the activities in as learning, art and service projects in our school days has been our way of fitting in the extras this month. 

It is not that we ignore acts of kindness other times of the year. An act per day when some require driving or leg work to drop off gifts, cards or gather supplies adds some time. 

I want to keep this going after Christmas too to keep us actively displaying love and being the hands and feet of Jesus. Probably more for me than the kids!

To do that I want to make a bigger list of actions we can take. We have 25 plus a couple resources from @shelivesfree  and @coffeecupsandcrayons I will plug into a blog post. 

One act we did was decorating and sending Christmas cards to the grandparents. It was our “keep the hands busy and the mouths quiet” during read aloud time. (My method...) 

What are the random acts of kindness on your list? What are acts of kindness others have done for you that have been appreciated? 

#randomactsofkindness #actsofkindness #kindness #showlove #belove #givelove #loveothers #handsandfeetofjesus #livefaith #faithoutloud #teachthemthewaytheyshouldgo #printables #bloggers #bloggerspreadingkindness #kindnessistruth #onetruth #christmascards2020 #diyprojects #homeschoolart #homeschoolserviceproject #motherhoodinsquares #inspiredmotherhood #intentionalmotherhood #motherhoodsocial
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