Welcome to Mom Motivation Mondays where weekly contributing writers share their motherhood experiences to encourage you to find the joy in being a mom.
{This week: Post by Lisa}
There are days when everything appears to be going good and all of a sudden my son or daughter gets angry or sad. They argue, fight, and throw tantrums over simple things that they usually handle well.
I’m like this too. I’ve overreacted to stressful situations because I was burned out. I don’t function well when I’m on empty and my kids don’t either.
It’s easier for adults to identify their needs and express their feelings than it is for kids.
The key to building up a child’s confidence is to care for our children’s souls. When kids feel loved they develop confidence.
At our house we pretend that we have an invisible bucket over our head. Our goal is to keep our buckets filled up with thankfulness, grace, kindness, peace, contentment, happiness, understanding, desire, inspiration, hope, and love. You can reinforce this idea with kindness coloring sheets for younger kids.
In life there are things that drain our bucket. My kids are learning to tell me when their bucket is getting low or empty. I help them identify why that is.
I strive to make sure that their bucket stays full.
I try my best to understand why my kid’s get frustrated and I’m learning how to help them stay emotionally stable.
The burdens our children carry may be similar or slightly different. Our solutions will vary depending on our children’s personalities.
Following are some of my personal observations about building up a child’s confidence.
–Kids have worries, fears, and anxieties
My two kids struggle from time to time with fear of failure. Or they feel anxious when they go to new places. We homeschool and once a week we take our kids to a full day of enrichment classes. At first my eight year old son worried what would happen if there was a fire. He also was anxious that I wouldn’t be able to pick him up when his classes were over.
It doesn’t help when we tell children not to worry. Instead they need us to help them process a plan of action.
Both of my kids find comfort in talking to God about their worries and they believe that God is with them. God fills their souls with His spirit and they soar. They rise above their concerns by putting their trust in a faithful God. We fill our home daily with Christian music, scriptures, Christian teachings and praise.
–Kids feelings get hurt
My kids want to do what is right. They take it very personal when they get in trouble. My son needs me to speak to him in a gentle affirming voice and I have a tendency to raise my voice to get my point across.
Kids need to know that they are still accepted and loved even when they make mistakes.
My son’s soul fills up with hugs and snuggles. He likes to talk about his feelings.
My six year old daughter on the other hand needs words of affirmation and a tickle time to lighten the mood.
-Kids get frustrated when things don’t go the way they think it should
Sometimes kid’s frustrations seem silly, selfish, or like no big deal. Kids feel like no one cares when we minimize their feelings. Instead they need our support to help them solve the problem.
-Kids get tired
My daughter could literally be on the go all day long with lots of outings and friends to hang out with. She gets clingy and grumpy if she doesn’t have someone to play with. But she has her limits.
My son on the other hand needs time to think, hang out, and be alone. He gets in a really bad mood if he is on the go all time.
-Kids are sensitive to stress
Every family has stress, trials, obstacles to overcome, and special needs. No matter what gets thrown at us, kids need to feel safe, comforted, and cared for.
We do this by providing routine, rituals, and time to focus on each other.
Kids feel better when they do something nice for others. In doing so there is a sense of belonging and importance.
-Kids need Moms and Dads who parent from a place of rest.
It’s important that we keep our buckets (souls) full of beauty, laughter, inspiration, and joy. Today take some time to write down those things that you need for yourself. We must remember that we can’t help our children fill their buckets if our buckets are empty.
I like to read God’s word, pray, write, cook, and buy some flowers!!
More Ideas on Building up a Child’s Confidence to Keep Their Buckets Full –
Here are links for your convenience. Enjoy them with your children. Great for ages 3-8.
Cute Online Book you can listen to with your kids – this story reminds me of my kids
Two activities for building up self-esteem in kids –Kiddie Matters
Fun Song to sing with kids – this is a great song to help our kids understand how our kindness to one another fills our bucket. My kids take this song to heart and respond with delight.
Teaching Children about Positive Affirmations – Kiddie Matters
How do you work on building up your child’s confidence?
Thank you for pinning the image below so more moms can get the motivation they need!
I was forty when I got married. I had my first child in 2008 and my second child in 2010. I am not a young mom. I’ve been married since 2006 to an amazing man that is my best friend and we live in Colorado. Before I had children I was a Preschool Teacher. Now I’m a Home School Teacher.
I write to encourage and inspire. Life is messy and sometimes makes no sense. I don’t have all the answers or claim to have it all together. I’m learning that I don’t have to be perfect. I’m loved by God just because, and so are you. My posts are meant to help you hang in there when you feel like giving up. Join us at Me Too Moments for Moms to connect with other moms seeking faith and joy in this season of life.
